My colleague Joe Graziose picks up tidbits from the internet that inform me or sometimes annoy me.  Yesterday it was the latter, an homage to Arab Sicily, a period that covered 200 years (AD 827 – 1091).

The conquest of Sicily by Muslims was a bloody affair and the so-called 200-year occupation witnessed plenty of Muslim-on-Christian and Sunni-on-Shia violence.  But don’t tell this to half-baked historians or Sicilians who revere this “Golden Age,” when the island was a paradise of multi-culturalism and Arab scholarship.  It’s the same rosy picture historians paint of Muslim Spain (AD 700 – 1492).

 We cannot deny that Europe experienced a “dark age” when Rome fell to barbarians.  In contrast, Islam had a very short window of enlightenment during this period.  In the Middle East, Arabs had been hobnobbing with pagan Greeks for centuries.  They picked up lots of science and technology from Greek books and eventually spread this early renaissance to Spain and Sicily.  But by the 1300s, Islamic fanatics replaced science with Allah.

But, let’s suppose Sicily remained Muslim into modern times.  Pick a Muslim country today that Sicilians would replicate – Iran?  Egypt? Turkey? Libya?  You get the point.  Yet, some die-hards consider the Arab occupation as near paradise.  The Arabs certainly introduced oranges, lemons, eggplant, and rice to Sicily, but every invader brings something, and these crops didn’t have far to travel.  Arabs no doubt mingled with the locals but science tells us they are a drop in the DNA bucket compared to the Italic and Greek roots of Sicilians.  Still, you’re told to thank the Arabs for cannoli even though you can’t find any in Cairo or Bagdad.

The way this dreamy Islamic history works is by glossing over hard truths like violent religious conversion, Sharia Law, White slavery, punitive taxes on Christians, suppression of women, and other hallmarks of traditional Islam.  All Islamic sins are forgiven when historians apply the 200-year “exception” in Sicily.

Great engineering but useless

Ask anyone if ancient Rome was a boon to civilization and they will rattle off negatives like crazy emperors, genocides, feeding Christians to the lions, and crucifixion.  Italic Sicily becomes a blur despite three thousand years of attachment to the peninsula, including being named after the Italic tribe of Sicels.

I’ve noticed more sugar-coating of Middle Eastern history in current cable documentaries on ancient Egypt.  It used to be that the pyramids were built by slave labor.  Now, archeologists inform us that Egyptian peasants happily built them as a way to achieve the afterlife by serving their Pharaoh. Essentially, Egyptian society was one big death cult.  But it’s not presented that way to viewers.  Imagine an entire civilization predicated on death.  Building tombs was a close second to growing food.  Mummifying was one of the most secure trades for three millennia.  Even generations of Greeks from Alexander the Great to Cleopatra adopted the death cult when they conquered Egypt.

Roman engineering was practical.

It finally took a cynical Roman, Sextus Julius Frontinus, an aqueduct engineer, to call out the Egyptians.  “Our aqueducts serve so many people; who would compare them to the idle Pyramids.”

But Egyptologists live to find another King Tut’s tomb, unspoiled by tomb raiders.  None of these scholars that I’ve heard thus far has ever suggested what a waste it was for ancient Egyptian genius and energy to sustain a death cult for so long.  Upon reflection, the Islamic obsession with martyrdom and the garden of 40 virgins may have its roots in pharaonic Egypt.

Thankfully, Sicily was liberated from Islam.  Leave the Koran; take the cannoli. -JLM